


Hunt and Gather

by Mooifyourecows



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Humor, M/M, and actually enjoying it despite his better judgment, and someone ends up in a collar, but lets be honest the focus is on Daichi's gay ass, getting roped into yet another AU!Suga's nonsense, i've kinda given up on the anomaly that is proper tagging, let us pray for the poor soul, look this is just shenanigans, of the bad influence kind, please don't be mean to your friends for fun, some background relationships too, there's alcohol, unless they deserve it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-05
Updated: 2018-07-05
Packaged: 2019-06-05 17:19:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15175574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mooifyourecows/pseuds/Mooifyourecows
Summary: “Wildly irresponsible... Me? Nah.”“Hmhm,” Sugawara nodded. “Wild and irresponsible Daichi, following strange men down dark alleys…" he wrapped his hands around his arm and tugged him to the right and into a shadowy alleyway between two buildings.Daichi’s heart leapt and raced as Sugawara faded into the darkness ahead of him, still pulling on his arm as he sang in a haunting voice,“Oh all the things that might happen to him…”





	Hunt and Gather

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Birthday Sugar!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> Mood:  
> [Go Big or Go Home](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dUZoK20_KYQ)  
> "Giving my body all the things I need  
> Rescue me with a little whiskey  
> Staying out, don't need no sleep  
> I'll sleep when I'm dead you can bury me"
> 
> [Pocket Full of Gold](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=haR4qKm3duM)  
> "All I need is a job that I love and some friends at the pub and a night full of fun  
> While searching for a pocket full of gold"
> 
> [ Nothing Better](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FSqTFIuXoQs)  
> "I don't believe it, I don't believe it  
> I don't believe it's true  
> There is nothing better than you  
> La di da di doo, there's nothing better than you  
> All that we've been through, there is nothing better than you"

“You. Come with me.”

A hand fell onto Daichi’s shoulder and yanked him to his feet, fingers locked tight in the fabric of his shirt. He flailed momentarily, one foot kicking the table from which he was suddenly being pulled.

“Wai—” he started, hand reaching out towards Ikejiri who made as if to rescue him, then, thinking better of it, shrugged and sat back, a smug smile curling his lips as he gave a wink and turned to Yui where she laughed on the opposite side of the table.

“Bye-bye Sawamura!” Yui cooed and fluttered her fingers.

Daichi stumbled as the hand continued to pull him backwards and he cast his so called “friends” a sinister glare.

“You’re so gonna get it when I come back,” he called, but the two seemed unimpressed by his threat.

“Hurry!”

Daichi finally turned himself and faced the stranger dragging him across the bar in the direction of the front door.

“Excuse me,” Daichi tugged on the man’s wrist. “Can you please release me?”

“Nah, you’ll escape.”

He stared at the back of the man’s head, at unruly locks of pale grey hair, and then down to a peach and green Hawaiian shirt and faded denim Bermuda shorts.

“Uhm…”

The man pulled Daichi through the door and immediately turned left down the sidewalk.

“Will you please tell me who you are and what you’re doing?” Daichi asked warily, tugging again at the man’s wrist.

“No time,” he said. He released Daichi’s shirt, but immediately caught his hand. “C’mon, hurry, if Tooru wins another then I’m totally bo— AH FUCK!” He pointed down the sidewalk to where a man in an outfit similar to his, Hawaiian shirt and Bermuda shorts, pulled a thick man with spiked white and grey hair in the direction of the stone fountain in the middle of the city square. “We gotta run!”

“Wh—” The word was cut short when the man suddenly bolted forward, yanking Daichi after him. He staggered and then got his feet under himself, matching the man’s pace.

“No, no, no,” the man panted. “We can’t lose, c’mon faster… c’mon, c’mon…”

The urgency in the man’s tone spurred Daichi forward. He had no idea what the hell was going on but apparently this was important and Daichi would be damned if he was the reason as to why this stranger lost some sort of race between the poorly dressed.

“Where?” Daichi asked.

“The fountai—”

Daichi pulled his hand from his and scooped the man up into his arms. He let out a squeak and held him around the shoulders as Daichi picked up his speed and sprinted towards the fountain, juking and darting his way through throngs of pedestrians.

The man giggled and squeezed him.

“Faster, faster! We can beat him!”

Daichi dodged a loud group of women, deciding he would just have to ask questions later, and lunged the last few meters to the fountain. As soon as he reached it, he collapsed onto the side, breathing heavily, and settled the man in his lap.

The man cheered and pumped an arm in the air and Daichi finally looked into his face.

_Oh._

_Oh._

_Oh._

With exception to his  _terrible_ fashion sense, the man was astoundingly beautiful. His pale, unruly hair was windswept back from his forehead. His round cheeks were flushed bright pink, and he stared up at Daichi with mischievous hazel eyes framed by long black eyelashes.

Daichi’s mouth went dry.

The man turned his head and Daichi gulped, stunned that he was actually relieved to no longer be under the man’s gaze.

“Well, well, well, Keiji-kun, what a surprise to see you here,” the man said, voice honey sweet. His fingers curled in the hair at the nape of Daichi’s neck and his heart thudded painfully.

The second man approached them, dragging behind the one with the white hair, who looked equally as confused as Daichi was feeling. His large golden eyes blinked and darted around the area.

“Well played, Sugawara-san,” the man with the Hawaiian shirt said, voice flat. He had short black hair and narrow, steely blue eyes. Around his neck hung a beaded necklace with what looked like a plastic penis hanging from it. Daichi gulped when their gazes met. The man was silent for a moment before humming, “Nice.”

The one in Daichi’s lap, Sugawara, giggled and leaned his head on Daichi’s shoulder.

“Uhm,” the man with the white hair drew their attention. “What’s going on?”

“What’s going on…” a new voice sounded from behind Daichi and all four turned towards it. Daichi’s mouth fell open. A third man donned in a Hawaiian shirt and jean shorts sat in a folding chair in the middle of the fountain, sipping from a coconut, an umbrella leaning against his shoulder as water from the fountain rained down from above. He peered over a pair of pineapple shaped sunglasses, long dual toned hair falling over his forehead, and finished, “is that Sugawara is now in the lead.”

Sugawara pumped his fist again, “Yusss…”

“Which means Keiji is now in second,” the man continued.

The black haired man sighed, “I’ll take it.”

“And Tooru…”

“I’m here! I’m here!”

Everyone turned towards the newest voice and watched as a tall brunette staggered in their direction, dragging a large man with spiky black hair and an irritated expression behind him.

“… is in last place,” the man in the fountain said and clicked his tongue. “Fallen from grace.”

“It’s not my fault!” the brunette whined. “Mine was uncooperative!”

The thick man grunted and glared around at the group.

“Doesn’t matter. You’re in last place. Come get your punishment.”

The brunette walked to the edge of the fountain and the other man met him. He pulled a black strap from his pocket and gestured for the brunette to lean closer. He reached up and dragged an eyepatch over the man’s left eye and then stepped back.

“There.”

“Not fair,” the brunette moaned, adjusting the patch. “Keiji-kun only got a necklace last time…”

The one called Keiji lifted the plastic penis to his lips and blew into it, letting out a high pitched whistle.

“I want a dick whistle too!” Sugawara piped in.

“It's a punishment,” the man in the fountain sipped from his coconut. “You’re not supposed to like it.”

“I like the dick whistle,” Keiji admitted.

“Then give it back.”

“No.”

“Will someone please tell me what the fuck is going on?” the large man with spiky black hair demanded. “I was with friends when this jackass showed up and kidnapped me.”

“Rude!” Tooru pouted.

“Like you couldn’t get away?” Sugawara asked, cocking a thick grey eyebrow.

The man didn’t respond.

“I’ll explain,” the man in the fountain sighed. “My name is Kozume Kenma, this is my bachelor party.”

When he didn’t go on, Keiji finished,

“We’re doing a scavenger hunt.”

Sugawara looked up at Daichi and smirked, “And you had the good fortune to be one of the prizes for us to find.”

“What?” Daichi blinked. “What were you supposed to find?”

Sugawara and the others exchanged a look.

“Anyway,” Kenma said. “Let’s move on to the next item.”

Sugawara cheered and finally climbed out of Daichi’s lap. He and the two others huddled in front of Kenma as he reached into his pocket and produced three folded strips of paper.

“Don’t read them yet,” he commanded as they each took one.

Daichi stood and joined the white haired man, the third also walking up, thick arms crossed over his chest.

“What do we do?” the white haired man whispered.

“Should we just leave?” Daichi asked.

“Hm,” the third glared at the others.

Sugawara, Keiji, and Tooru stepped back and Kenma lifted a hand.

“This is where things get interesting.”

“Ehh…” Tooru’s shoulders slumped. “I thought you said last round was where things got interesting? I don’t think I can handle anything more interesting.”

“From now on,” Kenma’s eyes flitted over Keiji’s shoulders at the other group of men. “You have partners.”

“That doesn’t sound good,” Daichi muttered.

“For the rest of the challenges, you have to work as a team with your partner or else you are disqualified.” Kenma pushed his pineapple sunglasses up his nose.

“No!” Tooru exclaimed. “That’s not fair! Mine was nearly impossible to even get here! There’s no way he’s gonna agree to that!”

“Then I guess you should have picked someone else.”

“Are you kidding? I mean, _look_ at him.”

All four stared at the angry man and his eyebrows pulled lower over fierce green eyes.

The men turned away.

“Good point,” Sugawara said.

“I can’t really blame you,” Keiji added.

“Nice,” Kenma said.

“Right?” Tooru adjusted his eyepatch.

“Well,” Kenma set his coconut on the side of the fountain and then lifted the hem of his Hawaiian shirt, displaying a fat fanny pack strapped at his waist. He unzipped it and dug around inside. “You’re just gonna have to do your best to convince him to play along, or get disqualified and let one of the others win.”

“Me,” Sugawara said.

“Me,” Keiji countered.

Tooru’s lip curled, “ _Over my dead body._ ”

Kenma climbed out of the fountain and moved between the two groups of men.

“Here,” he said, approaching Daichi. He held out a miniature bottle of whiskey.

Daichi took it and he moved on to the others, giving them their own miniature bottle. Once everyone had alcohol, Sugawara, Keiji, and Tooru opened theirs and started drinking.

“Names?” Kenma turned back to Daichi and the two others.

“Bokuto,” the white haired one said, cracking open his bottle and giving it a sniff.

“Daichi…”

Everyone looked to the last. He scowled and opened his bottle of tequila. He downed the entire bottle in one gulp and answered in a low voice,

“Iwaizumi.”

“Nice to meet you,” Kenma fetched his coconut and sipped from it. “So. You all will be partners in the rest of the scavenger hunt. Win, and you will get a prize. Any questions?”

Bokuto lifted his hand.

“Yeah?”

“What’s the prize?”

“Surprise.”

Bokuto oohed and ahhed, turning his wide eyes to Keiji, whose lips gave an infinitesimal tick upwards.

“Uhm,” Daichi glanced down at his whiskey, and then to Kenma. “Look… uh… I was kind of drinking with some friends. I don’t really have time for this…”

“Oh please, please, please, please,” Sugawara slid up to him and pressed his hands to his chest, leaning his face close. He blinked his wide hazel eyes at him, full lips pouting. “Please Daichi! I need you! If I get disqualified, Kenma-chan gets to punish me and he’s evil! He’s _evil_ I’m telling you!”

Daichi glanced over at Kenma, catching his smirk before he wiped it from his face. Sugawara continued to plead with him, Tooru approaching Iwaizumi to do the same.

The whole situation was ridiculous. Daichi had just wanted to go out with his friends, relax, and forget about work for a little while. How did it turn out like this? Just how did he get roped into partaking in some sort of weird bachelor party scavenger hunt? And just what were Sugawara and the others supposed to find that led them to dragging three random strangers away from their nights?

Daichi thought of Yui and Ikejiri. Neither of them had seemed to mind when he was suddenly kidnapped. If anything, they seemed thrilled to see him go.

_Ah._

_I was the third wheel, wasn’t I?_

“Please, please, please, please, I’ll give you a reward later!” Sugawara continued to beg, arms winding around Daichi’s middle. “I’ll make it worthwhile I promise!”

“Alright.”

Sugawara froze. He straightened, staring at him wide-eyed.

“Huh?”

“Alright,” Daichi repeated. He lifted the bottle of whiskey and downed it.

“You’ll do it?”

He nodded and tossed the empty bottle in a nearby garbage can.

Sugawara bounced excitedly, mouth stretching into a grin that made Daichi have to fight not to return. His joy was infectious.

Everyone turned to Iwaizumi. He let out a deep sigh, eyeing Tooru’s get-up wearily.

“I don’t have to wear one of those, do I?” he pointed to the Hawaiian shirt.

“Not unless you deserve punishment and that’s the punishment I decide for you,” Kenma examined his fingernails.

Iwaizumi’s face slackened and he turned his gaze to Tooru again. The taller man pressed his hands together and fluttered his lashes.

Eventually he let out a deep sigh and rubbed his eyes.

“Fine,” he mumbled. He looked to Kenma, “Can I get another one of those bottles?”

“Complete a task, get more liquor,” Kenma said. “Are you all ready?”

Keiji went to Bokuto’s side and the larger man jumped up and down.

“This is going to be fun!”

Sugawara, Keiji, and Tooru held their folded strips of paper up at the ready.

Kenma eyed them quietly for a moment and then said, “At the place where Kuroo and I had our first date. Ready, set, go.”

They pried their clues open. Sugawara turned to Daichi and read in a breathless voice,

“ _A rock painted like a cat._ ”

Sugawara shoved the paper into his pocket and grabbed Daichi’s hand.

“C’mon!”

The two other groups exploded into action right behind them as Sugawara led Daichi down the sidewalk in the direction of the street.

“Where are we going?” Daichi asked, darting behind Sugawara to avoid colliding with a man talking on his phone.

“A little cat café downtown,” Sugawara said.

“So we need to catch a taxi?” Daichi lifted his hand to hail a cab.

“No!” Sugawara pulled his arm back down to his side. “It’s against the rules! We’re not allowed to spend any money!”

Daichi grunted, “How the hell are we supposed to get downtown without spending money? Run?”

“Watch and learn,” Sugawara chuckled and the dark sound sent shivers down Daichi’s spine.

They stopped on the curb and looked up and down the street. Sugawara hummed and then let out a sudden, “Ah!”

He released Daichi’s hand and rushed off towards a line of driverless pedicabs parked in a small rectangular lot to their left.

“Ho-hold up,” Daichi rushed after him. “You’re not… Don’t tell me you’re—”

Sugawara ignored him and immediately jumped onto the nearest vehicle. “Get in,” he ordered Daichi, placing his feet on the pedals.

“Thi-this is grand theft auto!” Daichi hissed, looking over his shoulder in fear. “You can’t just take—”

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it, we’ll return it later!” Sugawara gestured at the chariot behind him. “Sit!”

“But—”

Tooru and Iwaizumi appeared and Daichi watched in disbelief as Iwaizumi climbed into the pedicab beside Sugawara’s and stacked his hands behind his head.

“Iwa-chan, shouldn’t you be the one pedaling?” Tooru asked. “You could probably go faster—”

“Considering I’m not emotionally invested in this little game, nah. And don’t call me Iwa-chan.”

Tooru groaned and climbed onto the bicycle seat.

Sugawara reached out and grabbed Daichi’s sleeve, “Get in!”

Despite his better judgment, Daichi conceded. He sat on the padded seat and gripped the sides of the vehicle with white knuckles.

“Hold on tight,” Sugawara sang and gave the pedals a tremendous shove.

The pedicab lurched forward and Sugawara didn’t waste time steering out into the street, using the sidewalk to pass a sedan crawling by.

“Get back here!” Tooru called after them.

Sugawara’s legs pumped and he lifted off of his seat, kicking his legs down harder. The pedicab gained speed and Daichi pressed back into the seat, heart racing in his chest as he anxiously watched them fly by car after car. Sugawara maneuvered through the traffic like a madman, controlling the pedicab more like a regular bicycle. Daichi swore there were a few times they actually turned so sharp that they lifted onto two wheels, and if Daichi hadn’t thrown himself across the seat to shift the weight, they would’ve wound up on their side in the middle of the street. After a few blocks, Tooru caught up to them, huffing and puffing, sweat lining his face and neck.

“Suga-chan…” he panted. “Fuck… you…”

Sugawara laughed, “C’mon Tooru-chan, where’s your stamina?”

“My passenger is heavier than yours!”

“Hey,” Iwaizumi growled.

“Uhm…” Daichi said. “Su-Sugawara… up ahead…”

“Shit,” Sugawara and Tooru both braked suddenly, causing their passengers to nearly topple out of their seats.

Tooru sat back and flapped his arms at the wall of cars before them. “Look at this shit!” he slicked his hair back from his face. “We’ll never get downtown in this traffic jam!”

“Quit bitching, we all know you’re enjoying the rest,” Sugawara sat once more and stretched his neck from side to side. Daichi gulped and watched a drop of sweat slide down the pale skin of his nape and disappear under the collar of his Hawaiian shirt.

“This fucking eyepatch is killing my depth perception,” Oikawa muttered and lifted the patch to rub his eye. “I almost took out a pedestrian.”

“No taking it off. You earned that punishment,” Sugawara scolded.

“How come you and Keiji-chan got easy ones?”

“If I had to guess, I’d say it was because the punishments are going to get worse as the night goes by.”

“Ugh.”

“Where _is_ Keiji, by the way?” Sugawara turned and peeked around the pedicab.

“Apparently his partner had a car.”

“No fair!”

“He’s probably in the same traffic as us.”

“Yeah but he doesn’t have to pedal and haul some fucking body builders around,” Sugawara jerked his thumb over his shoulder.

Daichi glanced at Iwaizumi, hoping that he would share in his pain at being an accessory to grand theft auto, but the other man somehow looked completely unconcerned, eyes wandering over Tooru’s back as he and Sugawara bickered.

Finally, the cars crept forward once more and without warning, Sugawara leaned over and punched Tooru in the face.

“Ah fuck!” Tooru cradled his cheek and Sugawara pulled ahead, trailing laughter.

“We’re off again! Hold tight, Daichi!” he said cheerfully and Daichi did as he was told, gulping when he swerved around a taxi, narrowly missing clipping the mirror.

 _I’m so going to prison tonight,_ Daichi thought, biting back his regret at agreeing to participate in the tomfoolery of strangers.

Another minute of dangerous travel passed and Sugawara made a sharp right turn down a one way street. They were nearly downtown, and the traffic became sparse, the cars few and far between.

Sugawara let out a breathless cheer.

“It’s pretty much… a straight shot… from here!” he panted. “We’re gonna get there… first!”

He spoke too soon, however, because just seconds later, the other pedicab gained their side, this time with Iwaizumi at the pedals, thick legs pumping.

“Ah!” Sugawara exclaimed. “Damn you Tooru!”

A sly smirk curled Iwaizumi’s lips and he sped past them. Tooru blew a kiss from the seat and then raised both of his middle fingers.

Sugawara groaned and leaned farther forward, desperately trying to pedal faster.

Daichi gulped.

And he should really just sit back and lay low, go along for the ride and don’t step too far into the life of crime.

But _damn_ did he hate to lose.

“Sugawara!” Daichi sat forward and grabbed the hem of Sugawara’s shirt. “Switch me!”

“Eh?”

Daichi tugged. “Hurry!”

Sugawara slowed the pedicab to a stop and they hurriedly changed positions. Daichi took a deep breath. He kicked the pedals into motion and the vehicle lunged forward once more. Daichi swallowed his fear of being arrested and focused all his energy into catching up to the other pedicab.

Which they finally did at the corner. Tooru’s and Iwaizumi’s cab began to slow and Sugawara suddenly called out,

“Daichi we need to turn left!”

Daichi steered the cab to the right shoulder of Iwaizumi.

“Sugawara! Put all your weight on the left side!”

Daichi didn’t check to see that he listened to him. Because the corner was right upon them and they were careening past Iwaizumi and Tooru, not slowing.

“Hold on,” Daichi said and jerked the handlebars to the left.

Sugawara let out a shriek as the pedicab tilted onto two wheels, metal screeching as they violently rounded the corner. Daichi leaned to the left, gritting his teeth with a wince when he felt his balance shift precariously.

But then the third wheel crashed back to the asphalt and they were steady once more.

Sugawara screamed triumphant laughter and a grin found its way to Daichi’s face. Tooru was shouting abuse at them from behind but Daichi didn’t risk a look back, continuing to pump his legs until they burned.

“Up there!” Sugawara stood behind him, placing one hand on Daichi’s back and pointing over his shoulder down the dark street. “It’s the one right there!”

Daichi drove them right up to the front of the cat café and Sugawara leapt out of the pedicab. Daichi quickly followed and they ran up to the door of the café.

“Okay, it’s closed,” Sugawara noted, tugging on the door. “But we just need to get a rock painted like a cat. Do you see any lying around?”

They scoured the store front, pawing through the flower beds decorating the small areas on either side of the path leading to the front door.

“I don’t see any,” Daichi admitted, checking inside the pot of hanging geraniums to the left of the door.

“Then… the back garden. C’mon,” Sugawara led him back onto the sidewalk and then into the alley next to the building.

Iwaizumi pulled his cab up next to theirs and Tooru stumbled out of it.

Sugawara squeaked and took off in a run, “Hurry!”

Daichi gave chase. They rounded the café and Sugawara stopped at the tall metal fence blocking their way into the back garden. They peered through the links.

“There!” Daichi pointed. Nestled together underneath a marble birdbath were several rocks painted like cats of various colors and patterns.

“On it,” Sugawara started climbing the fence and Daichi looked up and down the alley anxiously.

First they steal pedicabs and next they’re breaking in to a café?

Daichi was _so_ going to prison.

Sugawara started cursing and Daichi turned in time to see Tooru sprint up to them and immediately vault over the fence in one fluid motion, kicking Sugawara in the face in the process.

“Ah fuck!” Sugawara cringed away and clutched at his cheek.

“Revenge, Bitch,” Tooru cackled and darted across the garden. He grabbed one of the stones and bolted back to the fence.

“Daichi give me a boost!” Sugawara said and Daichi quickly grabbed his foot and forced him up and over the fence. He collapsed in a heap on the other side and then scrabbled towards the rocks.

“Later, Shithead!” Tooru leapt over the fence again and ran down the alley, passing Keiji and Bokuto along the way.

“The others are here,” Daichi informed Sugawara.

“God damn it,” Sugawara grabbed a rock and rushed to the fence. He struggled to climb over it, muttering under his breath.

Bokuto helped Keiji up and over and he landed gracefully on both feet, earning a stream of expletives from Sugawara when he finally reached the top of the fence and threw a leg over.

“Let’s go—” Sugawara started but then let out a shriek, falling forward.

Daichi lunged to catch him and Sugawara slammed into his chest, arms circling his middle.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, I’m caught,” he whined and Daichi looked up to where the metal link of the fence pierced the denim of his shorts at the thigh. “Help me get free, Daichi.”

Daichi grunted and maneuvered him in his arms so that his back pressed into his chest, and held him tight around the waist with one arm, reaching for the fabric with his other while Sugawara hung on.

Keiji returned and made it back to their side with none of the drama of Sugawara’s attempt.

“It was nice knowing you, Koushi,” Keiji said and disappeared.

Sugawara cried out in frustration and flailed, kicking his legs angrily against the fence.

“Just rip it!” he shouted.

Daichi gritted his teeth and yanked the fabric, tearing a huge hole in the shorts, displaying the pale skin of Sugawara’s thigh underneath.

He set him on the ground and they both raced to the end of the alley. After a short examination of the street, Daichi pointed at a small cluster of balloons tied to the terrace of the restaurant patio across the way.

The others were already there.

“Shit,” Sugawara kicked his heel against the pavement and they crossed the street to join the others.

Kenma sat in a folding chair, one leg crossed over the other, waiting for them.

“Look who decided to finally show up,” Tooru cooed with a smirk.

Sugawara raised his middle finger at him and handed the rock to Kenma.

“With a win for Tooru and a loss for Koushi, that puts the score back to zeros across the board,” Kenma tossed the rock to the side and stood. He gestured for Sugawara and he let out a sigh and stepped up to him.

Kenma reached into his fanny pack and brought something pink up to Sugawara’s neck. He latched it on and then fumbled in the pack once more, eventually producing a headband with black cat ears and what looked like a clip-on tail.

“Fail the Kitty challenge, become a kitty,” Kenma said and slid the ears into Sugawara’s hair. He gestured at him to turn and he did, reluctantly. Kenma lifted the hem of his shirt and clipped the long black tail to the belt loop at his back. “There.”

Sugawara moaned and reached up to scratch at the pink, belled collar around his neck. Daichi’s cheeks warmed and he coughed into his fist in attempts to erase the sudden rough feeling in the back of his throat.

_Ah shit he’s cute…_

“And for you.”

Daichi looked to Kenma as he held a large white t-shirt with a cartoonish woman's body printed on the front and back towards him. He stared at it for a long second.

“Seriously?”

“Would you rather also be a kitty? Because if you think I don't have more of those-”

Daichi took the shirt and pulled it on.

Kenma smirked and started distributing miniature liquor bottles amongst them. Once they were all empty, he passed Keiji, Tooru, and Sugawara strips of paper.

They held them at the ready, staring at Kenma warily.

He let out a sinister chuckle.

“At the place where Kuroo bought me Beedle. Ready, set, go.”

They ripped the clues open and read.

“ _Your greatest fear._ ”

“Hey, Ken-chan _fuck you!_ ” Tooru exclaimed, pointing at the other man. “Fuck you right to hell!”

Sugawara cursed under his breath and pulled Daichi back to their pedicab.

Keiji and Bokuto rushed to a red car parked a short distance away and Iwaizumi dragged Tooru from the laughing Kenma.

“Where to?” Daichi asked.

“I’ll drive. It’s a pet store a few blocks from here,” Sugawara said. “Beedle is Kenma’s tabby.”

They took their places and Sugawara kicked the cab into motion. The red car swerved around them, Bokuto behind the wheel. Soon after, the second pedicab, Iwaizumi at the helm, passed as well.

Daichi sat forward, “They’re getting ahead—”

“Don’t worry about it,” Sugawara chuckled. “I know a shortcut.”

He pedaled leisurely down the street until the car and other cab disappeared around the corner, then he hurriedly turned a sharp right into an alley.

“Hold tight!” he sang, and then they were soaring.

“Aaaahhhhhh!” Daichi gripped the sides of the cab and pressed back against his seat as the narrow road suddenly dipped down into a dangerous slope.

Sugawara lifted his legs up off of the pedals and screamed laughter, the sound snatched away by the wind blowing his hair and fake tail back.

Daichi squeezed his eyes shut and waited to die.

But instead of a crash and explosion, he felt his center of gravity shift and suddenly the cab was shooting upwards.

“Here we go!” Sugawara’s voice drew his attention.

His feet were back on the pedals and he stood, pumping like crazy as the slope curved up. Their momentum from the drop sent them right up to the very end of the alley and they exploded out onto the street. Sugawara jerked the handlebars to the right and Daichi frantically threw himself to the right side of the set to keep their wheels on the ground.

A loud beep blared in their ears and Daichi peeked over his shoulder to see Bokuto through the windshield of the red car, laying into the horn. Keiji was sitting forward in his seat, glaring with lips pursed, and behind the vehicle was Iwaizumi and Tooru, watching them in disbelief.

Sugawara laughed and drove down the center of the street, not giving the others a chance to pass them.

A short distance later, Sugawara pulled to the curb and hopped off. Daichi followed as he rushed up to the front door of a small shop. Through the windows were displayed all sorts of exotic and domestic animals. The lights were still on, the shop still open for the night, and Sugawara hurried inside.

He went to the shopkeeper standing behind a counter and Daichi followed.

“Where are your snakes?” Sugawara asked, breathless.

The man blinked at him, eyeing the ears and collar. “Uh… I’ll show you…”

The bell on the door jingled and the four others burst into the shop.

“Sir do you have any scorpions please?” Keiji asked, shoving Tooru away with a hand against his cheek.

Tooru swiped at him, “No! Tarantulas!”

“Wait your turn!” Sugawara snapped back. “I was here first!”

“Are you boys the bachelor party?” the shopkeeper asked.

“Eh… yes that’s us,” Sugawara dragged his wrist across his forehead, wiping away sweat.

The man smiled, “Right this way please.”

Sugawara looked at Daichi and they each cocked an eyebrow.

The group followed the man to the back of the store, where a table was set up with three glass tanks of various sizes atop it. Sugawara’s steps stuttered and he bumped into Daichi, letting out a low,

“Ugh…”

The shopkeeper stood on the other side of the table and faced them with a smile.

“Kozume-san said he wanted to see you boys holding a few of our friends!”

Tooru let out a choking sob and leaned heavily on Iwaizumi’s shoulder, hiding his face from view.

“ _Holding them?_ ” Sugawara repeated, disbelief and horror transforming his features.

“Whoaaa cool!” Bokuto walked up to the table and started closely examining the contents of each tank.

“So who would like to go first?”

Everyone turned at the sound of the new voice.

Kenma moseyed up to them, a popsicle in one hand, his folding chair in the other. He popped the chair open and sat down, crossing one leg over the other.

“Any volunteers?”

At first, no one moved. Then Daichi watched Sugawara’s hand raise slightly before he dropped it again, body shuddering.

Tooru’s sobbing grew in volume.

“I will go first,” Keiji stepped forward.

“Alright Keiji!” Bokuto cheered.

Kenma smirked and looked at the shopkeeper.

“The scorpion please.”

He opened the tank on the left end of the table and Keiji went up to it, wiping his palms on his shorts. The shopkeeper reached inside the tank and when he lifted his hand back out, a large black scorpion the length of his palm came with it.

Sugawara pressed back into Daichi’s side and Daichi grappled with the sudden urge to put his arm around him because surely that had to be the strangest intrusive thought he had ever had.

The shopkeeper approached Keiji and the man’s blue eyes widened as he watched the scorpion draw near.

“Bo-Bokuto-san,” he said. “I implore you, please hold my hand.”

“Sure!” Bokuto took his offered hand.

Keiji took a deep breath.

“Alright. I’m ready.”

Kenma lifted his phone and pointed it in his direction as the shopkeeper gently nudged the scorpion into Keiji’s free palm.

Keiji didn’t make a sound. He chewed his bottom lip, gaze locked on the creature. It moved slowly, crawling across the surface of his skin to his wrist.

Daichi eyed it warily, glancing between it and Kenma, who seemed absolutely gleeful at the display, filming the interaction with his phone as he licked his popsicle.

Finally he lowered the phone.

“That’s good enough,” he said.

The shopkeeper took the scorpion from Keiji and the man released a heavy sigh of relief and turned to Bokuto. He wrapped his arms around his neck and leaned into him, burying his face in the side of his throat.

Bokuto’s eyes widened and his mouth flapped.

“Alright that puts Keiji in the lead,” Kenma said. “Now who’s next? Keep in mind that the person who goes third will be in last place and will suffer a _punishment_.”

“Me,” Sugawara stepped away from Daichi’s side. “Let’s get it over with. C’mon, hurry up.”

Kenma smirked.

“Very well. Bring out the snake, please.”

The shopkeeper returned the scorpion to its tank and they all watched as walked to the end of the table to the tank on the right inside which a small yellow snake napped under a heat lamp.

Sugawara muttered something and Daichi moved closer to hear.

“It’s fine. It’s tiny. It can’t hurt me. It’s nothing. It’s fine. It’s alright.”

The shopkeeper reached for the lid.

“Wait,” Kenma said.

Everyone looked at him. His smirk widened and he gestured at a large tank behind the shopkeeper.

“You sure?” his eyebrows lifted.

“Hmhm.”

“Alrighty.” He turned away and Sugawara tensed as he opened the larger tank and leaned inside.

“No, no, no, no, no,” Sugawara chanted as the shopkeeper lifted a large python up in his arms. “No, no fucking way that’s not fair Kenma you fucking _dick_ —”

“Is this the sound of a forfeit?” Kenma cupped his ear with one hand.

“Ohhhh my god I hate you so much,” Sugawara whined and backed into Daichi again. “I can’t! It’s huge! It’ll strangle me!”

“That’s a risk I’m willing to take,” Kenma admitted, lifting his phone and pointing it in his direction.

Sugawara whimpered and recoiled when the shopkeeper rounded the table. The bell on his collar jingled and the way he looked, cowering into Daichi’s side with those cat ears and look of terror on his face… it evoked a sudden protective urge from Daichi.

He didn’t know this guy.

Since the moment he dragged him away from his friends and into this hellish game, he had made nothing but bad impression after bad impression.

He was irresponsible, wild, possibly a criminal… cute.

But for better or for worse, he was Daichi’s partner.

Anyway, it was Daichi who had agreed to continue on with this nonsense in the first place, so it wasn’t like none of the responsibility belonged to him.

They were partners.

And Daichi ought to pull his own weight.

Daichi took Sugawara’s shoulders and turned him so that they faced one another. Sugawara stared up at him with wide eyes. His face had gone white as a ghost and he wobbled, weak in the knees.

“Hey Game Master,” Daichi said, not taking his eyes off of Sugawara’s. “We’re partners so it’s alright if I help, right?”

“So long as I get a video of Koushi wearing that snake like a scarf, I don’t care what you do,” Kenma replied.

Daichi nodded and inhaled deeply.

“Okay,” he said. “It’s gonna be fine. This is what we’re going to do.” He took Sugawara’s hips and maneuvered him back against the table. “Lean on the table so you don’t fall down. Now, I’m going to be right here,” he placed himself firmly in front of him and gestured for the shopkeeper. “It’s gonna be half on me and half on you.”

Sugawara whimpered and cowered away when the shopkeeper moved closer. “I don’t want it—”

“It’s going to be fine,” Daichi said. The shopkeeper went to him first and raised the massive reptile towards his shoulders. “What’s the thing you’re scared of most about this thing?”

“ _Everything._ ”

“It’s the chance that it’ll constrict, right? That’s what everyone is scared of when they see a snake this big.”

The shopkeeper draped half of the snake’s body over Daichi’s shoulders and he steeled himself. It was heavier than he expected.

“Well that too,” Sugawara squeaked, eyes growing impossibly wider.

“But since I’m here too, there’s no way that he can constrict on us.”

“ _Why not?_ ”

“I won’t let him.”

“You really think you can stop it?” Sugawara scoffed, flinching when the shopkeeper lifted the other half towards him.

“You saying you don’t believe I could?” Daichi cocked an eyebrow. “How insulting. I’m your partner, aren’t I? You should have a little more faith in the man you chose.”

Sugawara was silent. He stared up at Daichi and the shopkeeper paused, waiting for permission to finish his task.

“Okay,” Sugawara reached out and gripped Daichi’s sides, fingers digging into the fabric of his shirts. “Let’s just get it over with.”

Daichi glanced at the ears poking out of his hair and smirked.

“Good kitty.”

Sugawara’s lips ticked up and his expression turned mischievous. “Now, now, Daichi do you want to get rough with this pussy—” The line was cut short with a squeak as the shopkeeper gently draped the body of the snake over his shoulders. His fingers squeezed Daichi’s sides, almost to the point of bruising, and Daichi placed his hands on his arms.

“It’s alright,” he said. “Look at how gentle he is.”

The python lifted his head up towards Sugawara’s face and he squeezed his eyes shut, eyebrows quivering.

Daichi gulped and slowly lifted his hand. He nudged the snake’s head and it turned its attention to him instead, stretching towards him in what he was hoping was innocent curiosity. A skinny forked tongue fluttered out of its mouth and Daichi held his breath as it coasted up to his neck and glided across, the smooth scales ticking his skin. The python’s tail curled under Daichi’s armpit and he flinched. But then his head was in his hair and Daichi couldn’t keep the smile from his lips.

“Look,” he said again. “Sugawara. We’re becoming friends.”

Sugawara hesitantly peeled his eyes open, wincing when he saw how far the snake had traveled. Daichi reached up and gently smoothed a hand over the silky scales.

“See? He’s not so bad. Feel how soft he is.”

Daichi slowly took Sugawara’s wrist and pried his fingers from his shirt.

Sugawara whimpered, but didn’t pull away. Daichi brought his hand up to the warm body and pressed it to it.

Sugawara bit his bottom lip, expression twisted, but didn’t pull away. He allowed Daichi to pet his hand over the scales slowly, eyeing it warily.

“Feels nice, doesn’t it?” Daichi asked with a smile.

Sugawara snorted, “ _Kinky_.”

The sound of a tongue clicking drew their attention. Kenma lowered his phone.

“Boring. Okay let’s move on to the fun one.”

 Sugawara let out a breath of relief and the shopkeeper went about untangling the snake from their shoulders. Once it was gone, Sugawara slumped into Daichi’s chest.

Daichi’s heart thudded and he put his arms around him.

_Relax._

_Calm down._

_Stupid heart._

It must just be delayed nerves from having the python on him. Not… not something else. Like… the fact that Sugawara was… really cute… and touching him.

He was practically a complete stranger.

And probably a criminal.

So Daichi was totally not currently having like… a gay crisis… or anything like that.

_Definitely not._

Daichi stepped back, but Sugawara remained firmly in his personal space.

And Daichi was kind of… sort of… like… not complaining about that.

Sugawara was cute after all. And Daichi couldn’t deny that he felt… nice pressed up against him.

But he totally wasn’t having a gay crisis.

( _Yet_ )

“Alright Tooru, your turn!” Kenma sang.

“No!” Tooru wailed. “I can’t! I won’t! You can’t make me!”

“Is that the sound of a forfeit I hear?” Kenma leaned forward. “Do we have our first official loser?”

“ _First_?” Keiji repeated.

“Hmm,” Kenma finished off his popsicle. “Didn’t I tell you? The games go on, even if someone forfeits. It just means I get to play with _two_ losers later on.”

Sugawara finally leaned away from Daichi and glared at Tooru, “You better not fucking forfeit you goddamn pussy. We all did it so man-up and hold that spider!” he pointed at the middle tank.

Tooru choked on a sob and wiped his eyes, “But I _can’t_.”

“Nothing that spider can do to you will ever be as bad as the torture Kenma-kun will force you to go through,” Keiji pointed out.

Tooru was silent for a moment.

Daichi nervously eyed Kenma, who smirked.

He didn’t want to know what sort of torture the man was capable of.

Tooru continued to contemplate for long seconds, eyes bloodshot, cheeks ruddy from his crying and Daichi glanced at Iwaizumi, who watched his partner silently.

Talk about a confusing guy. Looking at him, he didn’t look like the type to willingly go along with this sort of thing. And yet there he was. He had even seemed to be having a good time when they were racing on the pedicabs.

What was his story?

What did he gain from following along with Tooru?

Another several tense seconds ticked by and finally, Iwaizumi snapped his fingers at the shopkeeper. Everyone looked at him and he commanded,

“Give it here.”

The shopkeeper opened the tank and Kenma hurriedly lifted his phone.

Tooru took a hasty step backwards but Iwaizumi grabbed him by the back of his shirt and dragged him closer.

“No,” Tooru cried, holding his hands up in defense. “I can’t! I can’t! I can’t! Just let me die!”

Iwaizumi held one hand up and the shopkeeper approached, a hairy tarantula in his palm.

“No, no, no, no,” Tooru struggled, tugging on Iwaizumi’s wrist over his shoulder. “I can’t do it, I can’t—”

The shopkeeper gently placed the large spider in Iwaizumi’s hand.

Tooru writhed and shrieked, but Iwaizumi’s grip was ironclad.

“Calm down,” Sugawara demanded. “You’re gonna just make it harder if you agitate it!”

“This is the best night of my life,” Kenma muttered, mouth stretching wide in a grin.

“You can do it, Tooru,” Keiji encouraged, though he took a step away from the creature.

Bokuto moved closer, staring with wide eyes, obviously itching to have a turn.

Daichi chewed on the inside of his cheek and waited for disaster to strike.

“Look at me,” Iwaizumi growled, and the authority in his tone drew every set of eyes in the room.

Tooru’s struggling faded momentarily as he met his partner’s gaze.

Iwaizumi released his shirt and instead grabbed the back of his head. Without saying a word, he dragged Tooru forward and crushed their mouths together.

Bokuto let out a scandalized gasp, slapping his hands over his face, peeking through his fingers.

Daichi’s eyes widened and his heart thundered.

_Oh._

_Jeez._

Iwaizumi slanted his lips over Tooru’s, deepening the kiss forcefully. Daichi’s cheeks warmed and he felt like maybe he should look away, but then Iwaizumi’s hand moved closer to Tooru’s shoulder and his eyes zeroed in on the motion.

Iwaizumi used his thumb and nudged the tarantula onto Tooru’s shoulder, not breaking the contact between their mouths all the while.

“Never mind,” Sugawara mumbled and Daichi glanced at him. He pouted his lips. “ _That’s_ kinky.”

Daichi couldn’t argue with that.

Iwaizumi tugged Tooru’s hair, finally ending the kiss with a wet sound. He held him still and then nodded at the spider taking up residence on his shoulder.

Tooru’s hazy, flushed expression cleared at the realization and he pressed his lips together, a muffled whine trying to break free of his throat. But he stayed as he was, not moving, even when the tarantula began to explore, creeping closer to his neck.

Eventually, Kenma showed mercy and gave the okay to end the torture.

Iwaizumi scooped the tarantula off of his shoulder and handed it back to the shopkeeper.

“Good job,” he said. “You did well.”

Tooru let out a deep breath and then shook from head to toe as if to dispel his body from the horror he just suffered.

“Iwa-chan can I have another kiss?” he moaned, latching on to his arm.

“Maybe later,” Iwaizumi said.

Daichi stared at him.

_Just what is he?_

“Okay, I’m satisfied with this,” Kenma said and stood. “Thank you Shopkeeper-san. You were a good sport tonight.”

“It was my pleasure,” the shopkeeper chuckled and went about cleaning up.

Kenma distributed alcohol to everyone, pausing next to Tooru in order to pass him his punishment for completing the challenge last.

“Getting last place in the Pussy challenge means you get to dress like one.”

Tooru took the pair of pink lacy underwear with a scowl.

“And what do I do with this?”

“It’d make a lovely hat, methinks,” Kenma moved on to Bokuto and Keiji, handing them miniature bottles.

Tooru grumbled and pulled the underwear on over his hair.

Iwaizumi snorted and turned his face away.

“You’re not off the hook,” Kenma returned to him and pulled a pair of joke glasses complete with a large fake nose and black mustache from his fanny pack. He handed it to Iwaizumi and the man slid them onto his face without complaint.

“The scores are now as follows,” Kenma passed new strips of paper out next. “Keiji is leading with one point. Koushi is still at zero. Tooru has dropped to the negatives again.”

Everyone drank their alcohol and Kenma smirked.

“Ready for the next round?” When no one complained, he went on, “Alright then. At the place where Kuroo proposed. Ready, set, go.”

They opened their clues and Daichi peeked over Sugawara’s shoulder.

“ _Rubber Duck._ ”

Everyone whirled for the door and bolted.

Out on the street, Sugawara turned suddenly and tackled Keiji to the sidewalk. They landed in a heap and Daichi and Bokuto watched in horror as they rolled, throwing punches.

“What are you doing?” Daichi demanded.

Sugawara got his arm around Keiji’s throat and squeezed, panting heavily.

“Keiji… is the only one… who knows where Kuroo proposed…”

Daichi then noticed that Tooru was also hanging by, waiting for the result of the fight.

Keiji kneed Sugawara between the legs and he released him, letting out a low groan as he rolled to the side. Keiji attempted to scrabble to his feet, but Tooru was on him next, pinning him down on his stomach.

“It’s not my fault neither of you…” Keiji said, writhing beneath him. “Bothered to ask…”

“He’s got a point.”

Daichi glanced over his shoulder where Kenma stood, sliding his pineapple glasses back onto his face. He lifted his folding chair and headed down the sidewalk.

“Be more concerned about the details of your friend’s life. See you guys when you get there.”

Daichi leaned over and pulled Sugawara to his feet, locking an arm around his waist.

“Why don’t we just follow Kenma?”

“Against the rules,” he grunted, clutching at his groin with a wince.

Bokuto sidestepped around the two wrestling on the ground, hands out like he wanted to help his partner.

“Don’t even think about it,” Iwaizumi said in a low voice, the seriousness of his tone undercut by the addition of the joke glasses.

“Okay, okay!” Keiji elbowed Tooru in the face. “Let’s make a deal!”

Tooru leaned back, knee still pressed down in the other man’s back.

“I’m listening,” he said.

“We’ll go there together. In Bokuto-san’s car. That way, everyone can rest and get there at the same time. So it’ll be a fair fight.”

Tooru and Sugawara grumbled loudly.

“Deal,” Daichi decided.

“Daichi!” Sugawara whined. “We don’t make deals with terrorists!”

“You want to keep driving that damn pedicab?” he scowled.

Sugawara was silent for a moment before sighing.

“Alright.”

After collecting themselves, all six men made their way to where Bokuto parked his car.

“Not enough seats,” Sugawara pointed out as they popped the doors open.

“You’re the smallest,” Tooru said, climbing into the back seat. “Sit on someone’s lap.”

A minute later, they were all piled inside, Sugawara happily perched on Daichi’s lap with his arms around his neck, and Daichi played his desperate claim to not be in the midst of a gay crisis on repeat in his mind, ignoring the tightness in his lower abdomen that intensified every time Sugawara shifted the tiniest bit.

Bokuto pulled the car from the curb and followed Keiji’s directions down the street.

“So is it just me, or was that last challenge kinda mean-spirited?” he asked when they were on their way.

“Ah, well,” Sugawara’s fingers played with the hair at the back of Daichi’s neck and he gritted his teeth.

_I’m not having a gay crisis._

_I’m not having a gay crisis._

“That was probably revenge,” Sugawara said. “For that time we took advantage of the fact that Kenma-kun is terrified of clowns and volunteered him for a trick at the circus.”

“If I would have known he would get his own revenge eventually, I wouldn’t have sat and listened to the entirety of Tetsu-chan’s lecture about that,” Tooru muttered.

“It just means we’re even now,” Keiji said, peering through the window at the passing buildings. “Clean slate means no more guilt.”

“It sounds scary when you say it, Keiji-kun,” Sugawara giggled.

“Well. I’ve got a few things in mind that I’ve been wanting to try out.”

“ _Uwah. Scary._ ”

“You guys…” Daichi hesitated. “Ah, you guys have an… _interesting_ relationship.”

“You mean your friends don’t set up torturous scavenger hunts from time to time?” Sugawara asked with a grin.

Daichi chuckled, “Nah… they mostly just confide in me separately about how in love with each other they are.”

Sugawara smiled warmly.

“Well, that can be fun too. It was a riot watching Kuroo pine after Kenma back in high school.”

Tooru sputtered and then pretended to cry, blubbering, “ _What… do… I… do… 'kawa-chan? I… just… love… him… so… much… and… want… to… wake… up… with… him… every… morning… for… the… rest… of… my… life… boo hooooooooo_!”

The car filled with laughter.

“What a disaster,” Keiji chuckled.

“Hmm…” Iwaizumi hummed. “This is all better than what I usually do with _my_ friends.”

“Which is?” Tooru pressed.

“Suffer.”

They laughed again.

“Hey, this is suffering for us!” Sugawara said.

“Yeah but not for me,” Iwaizumi smirked.

Keiji turned to Bokuto, “What about you, Bokuto-san?”

“Eh?”

“What do you and your friends usually do?”

“Oh…” he paused. “Uh… well I haven’t lived here for very long. So I haven’t really seen my friends in a while.”

Keiji blinked at him.

“But uhh… when we lived closer, we played a lot of sports together!”

“Hmm, you haven’t made new friends here yet?” Tooru asked.

“Well…” Bokuto’s hands squeezed the steering wheel and through the rearview mirror, Daichi noticed color touch his cheeks. “I’ve been kinda busy…”

“Awww,” Sugawara reached over the seat and ruffled his spiked hair. “You can be our friend, Bokuto-chan!”

“Yeah, just hang out with us,” Tooru examined his fingernails. “You and Tetsu-chan would probably get along well.”

“O-oh! Uh… I mean… if it wouldn’t be weird…” A smile spread over his face. “I’ve been having a lot of fun tonight!”

“I’m glad someone is,” Tooru groaned.

“I’m having fun too!” Sugawara said and grinned at Daichi. “What about you, Daichi?”

He gulped.

If he was being completely honest, he was a little too confused about his own feelings to be able to tell if the time he was having that night was _fun._

There was a certain thrill about it, he had to admit. It had been a long time since he had done something that got his heart racing like this. It was terrifying, and he was still concerned that he might wind up behind bars at some point that night, but it was thrilling. There was also the matter of the gay crisis he definitely wasn’t experiencing in response to the undeniable cuteness his partner radiated.

“His silence should tell you everything you need to know, Suga-chan,” Tooru said with a snort.

Sugawara pouted his lips and tightened his hold around Daichi’s neck.

“Well,” he said. “You’ll be having fun by the end of the night. I’ll make sure of it.”

Daichi didn’t like the sound of that.

(Or maybe he liked the sound of that a little too much.)

They reached their destination a minute later.

Bokuto pulled the car up to the curb and everyone peered through the windows at the massive city park beyond.

“He proposed as he was passing the pond,” Keiji informed them.

“The park?” Tooru scoffed. “Tetsu-chan is so unromantic.”

“Well he _did_ propose on accident,” Sugawara said, straightening in Daichi’s lap and giving his self-control a run for its money.

“How do you propose on accident?” Iwaizumi grunted.

“It’s pretty easy when you’re bad at keeping secrets and forget who you’re talking too.”

Tooru grinned and mimicked again, “ _Oh by the way, I picked up the engagement ring on the way here and it looks so good. I can’t wait to ask you to marry me this weekend at the cabin._ ”

“Disaster Gay,” Keiji said in a soft voice.

Silence fell over the car for a moment.

“Well,” Sugawara said. “So I guess the truce is over and it’s back to trying to kill each other?”

“May the best man win,” Keiji said.

“Thank you, Keiji-chan. I intend to,” Tooru smirked.

“Ready, set, go!” Sugawara threw the door open and he rolled out of the car.

Everyone followed shortly behind.

They were barely a meter onto the grass of the park when Keiji struck.

Daichi let out a yelp as the man slammed into Sugawara and sent him flying to the ground.

“Bokuto-san, you know the plan!” he called and then took off across the park after Tooru and Iwaizumi.

“Got it!” Bokuto quickly intercepted Sugawara when he climbed to his feet and attempted to follow the others.

“Ah! No fair!” he leapt forward and was caught around the waist by the larger man.

Daichi moved to help him but he waved his hand frantically.

“Go! Go! Follow them!”

Daichi hesitated and then ran after the others.

Up ahead, Keiji was attacking Tooru, who screamed and dodged him, forking off across the park. Iwaizumi continued in a straight line in the direction of the pond and Daichi did the same.

A small smile found its way onto Daichi’s lips as he pumped his arms and legs in chase.

He was playing a childish game with strangers late at night in the city park.

How ridiculous.

How...

_Fun…_

Eventually, the pond came into view, and with it, Kenma, sitting in his folding chair and sipping from another coconut. Iwaizumi and Daichi ran up to him and started hunting around.

“Rubber duck,” Daichi panted. “Where are they?”

Iwaizumi growled and stalked along the length of the pond, searching left and right. Kenma watched them with amusement, snapping photos with his cell phone.

Tooru and Keiji showed up soon and they joined the search.

“Where the fuck?” Tooru panted after they combed the area.

“They should be here,” Keiji said. “Kuroo-san proposed right around here. Unless…”

“Rubber duck…” Daichi murmured.

All at once, every set of eyes peered out across the dark pond.

Kenma’s laughter erupted behind them.

“Bingo!”

Tooru whirled towards him, “Ken-chan you bastard!”

He leaned back in his chair with a smug smile, “Anyone up for a midnight swim?”

“Are you kidding?” Iwaizumi said. “I don’t know what’s in there.”

“How deep is it?” Keiji asked. “I’m not a great swimmer.”

“That shit is deep,” Tooru said. “Tetsu-chan fell in it last summer and almost drowned.”

Daichi leaned his hands on his knees, staring at the dark water.

And he really hated to lose.

But swimming? In the city pond? In the middle of the night?

Did he hate losing _that_ much?

“Is there a boat around?” Keiji turned in a slow circle.

“As if it’d be that easy,” Tooru said bitterly.

Kenma chuckled, “As if.”

Daichi inhaled deeply and let it out.

If he did this… Sugawara would probably be grateful.

Grateful enough to give him a reward, probably.

Not that Daichi really wanted one of those.

Even if he was a little curious as to what sort of reward he might receive if he won the round for him.

As he mulled it over, a voice rang out across the park.

“Keiji! Look out!”

Everyone faced the shout.

Sugawara sprinted across the park in their direction, wearing a determined expression.

He took note of where they were standing and understanding flicked over his face. He slowed his running enough to kick his shoes off, yanking the cat ears from his head and ripping open the front of his Hawaiian shirt.

_Oh._

Daichi’s stomach grew tight and hot.

Sugawara shed his shirt and then wiggled out of his shorts. He hooked a finger in his socks and removed them next. Dressed only in a pair of tight, grey boxer briefs and the collar, he picked up his speed again and flew past the small group. He dove into the pond without a second’s hesitation, the rest staring after him in shock.

_Oh._

Daichi tugged on his collar and gulped.

_Hot…_

Sugawara resurfaced with a loud gasp and was then immediately swimming towards the center of the pond.

Daichi watched him with mouth hanging open, in awe at the sheer intensity of the man’s powerful stroke.

_I’m not having a gay crisis._

_I’m not having a gay crisis._

Tooru let out a loud expletive.

“ _Damn you, Suga-chan!_ ” he shouted.

Bokuto joined them, panting.

“Sorry Keiji,” he moaned. “I tried to hold him back…”

“It’s alright, Bokuto-san,” he replied. “You held him back longer than I expected you to.”

Iwaizumi propped his hands on his hips and whistled.

“Shit his form is beautiful.”

“Well he used to be a lifeguard,” Tooru muttered, crossing his arms over his chest. “If Suga-chan wins this round, that puts him at one point. If I lose, I’m at negative _two_ … ugh. Fine.” Tooru started to undress.

“I’m really not a strong swimmer,” Keiji said.

“I can’t swim,” Bokuto admitted sheepishly.

“Guess you guys are boned,” Tooru said. Once he was stripped down to his underwear, he sat on the edge of the pond and dropped into the water, letting out a high pitched whine. “Eww… it’s so slimy and cold…” He shivered and started swimming slowly in the direction Sugawara had gone. “Ahhh, something touched my foot oh my _god_ this sucks so bad!”

Kenma chuckled.

Splashing drew Daichi’s attention in time to see Sugawara on his way back to shore. He gulped and went to meet him. He reached the land and peered up at Daichi, mouth open, breathing heavily.

Daichi offered a hand and Sugawara took it. He hauled him up out of the water and Sugawara stumbled into him and a breathy laugh.

“Suck my dick, losers,” he panted and displayed a small, yellow, rubber duck.

He staggered off in Kenma’s direction and Daichi followed, attempting but failing miserably to keep his eyes off his sleek, wet backside. The soaked fabric of his underwear clung to his form but Daichi was definitely not having a gay crisis.

Sugawara handed the rubber duck over to Kenma.

“Thank you,” he said. “Look at that… you’re back in the positives with one point.”

“Pleasure doin’ business with you,” Sugawara groaned and bent over, bracing his hands on his knees.

 _Oh_.

Kenma caught Daichi staring at something Daichi really shouldn’t have been staring at, and he turned away to escape the smug look that filled the man’s golden eyes.

A minute later, Tooru showed up once more and Iwaizumi pulled him onto dry land.

“Ahhhh that was the worst!” Tooru stretched out on the grass, chest rising and falling quickly.

Unlike Daichi, Iwaizumi eyed his partner without a hint of shame.

“Ken-chan I’m so getting you back for this!” he whined and rolled to his knees. Iwaizumi helped him to his feet and he turned to Keiji and Bokuto. “Keiji-chan, I brought you one too,” he showed his hands, in which were two ducks. “But only because I didn’t want you to drown. And Suga-chan probably wouldn’t jump in to save you if you did.”

“Good guess,” Sugawara straightened and stretched his arms over his head.

Kenma caught Daichi staring at something _else_ that Daichi really shouldn’t have been staring at, and he kicked himself for falling for the same trick twice.

“Oh, thank you Tooru—”

“But it ain’t for free,” Tooru interrupted when Keiji reached for the duck. “We had to get wet. So do you.”

Kenma chuckled.

Keiji’s nose twitched and he glanced at the pond.

“Just a dip,” Tooru sang.

“Can’t you give me a break and I’ll owe you one later?”

Tooru lifted the duck and pulled his arm back, aiming out over the water.

“No!” Keiji grabbed his shirt and started unbuttoning it. “Okay! Fine. Just a dip.”

Tooru grinned and walked over to Kenma to give him his duck.

Keiji sighed and undressed, unfazed by the prying eyes that watched his every move. Bokuto pressed his hands over his red face, but peeked through his fingers nonetheless.

Once he was down to his underwear, he went to the edge of the pond and looked back at Tooru, as if to give him the chance to show mercy.

“Full submersion, please,” Tooru squeezed the duck and it squeaked.

Keiji sighed again. He faced the water and plugged his nose. He took a deep breath through his mouth and jumped into the water, breaking the surface with a splash.

Tooru laughed a triumphant laugh and then cocked his arm back as if to throw the duck into the pond, but Sugawara sliced him in the ribs and he cowered away.

“I refuse to get back in that water,” Sugawara said.

“Then let him drown,” Tooru grunted.

Keiji resurfaced, splashing clumsily and Sugawara snatched the duck out of Tooru’s hand.

“Alright, come on out, Keiji,” he called, ignoring Tooru’s growl.

Bokuto helped his partner back onto dry land and Keiji shook water from his hair. Sugawara tossed the duck to them and everyone gathered in front of Kenma. Keiji passed the duck over and Kenma stood.

“There was a lot of teamwork going on this time,” he said, unzipping his fanny pack. “My heart is touched. You get two bottles of alcohol each as a reward.”

“Oh thank God,” Sugawara took his offered bottles and immediately cracked one open.

_Thank God is right._

Daichi gulped down the first bottle of rum and moved instantly onto the next.

“For the loser of the Swimming challenge…” Kenma handed Keiji a bulky pair of goggles. “Maybe these will come in handy.”

Keiji sighed and pulled the goggles over his head.

“And for the loser’s partner,” Kenma gave Bokuto a strip of neon green fabric.

He stretched it out, revealing that it was a pair of booty shorts with “Nasty” written across the back in glittery pink letters.

“Do I have to wear these on my head?” he asked.

“You can wear them normally if you’d like.”

Bokuto hesitated, but then shrugged. He discarded his pants and then pulled the shorts on. They stretched and strained against his thighs and Sugawara muttered,

“Nice.”

Keiji fanned his face.

“Moving on,” Kenma passed out their next clues. “At my favorite bar. Ready, set, go.”

He turned and walked away before anyone even had their papers open.

Daichi looked to Sugawara. He stared down at the clue with a look of confusion.

“What does it say?” Daichi moved closer to his side, careful not to brush his bare skin.

“It just says, _Your Best_ ,” Sugawara showed it to him.

“Your best?” Daichi cocked an eyebrow. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I have no idea…” Sugawara glanced at the others. “What does it mean?”

“Dunno,” Tooru sighed and crumpled up the paper. “He’s just fucking with us now.”

Keiji went to his pile of clothes and crouched down. “Let’s just get to the bar and figure it out there.”

“Bokuto-chan will you drive us all again?” Tooru fluttered his lashes at him.

“Uh… actually, I don’t think I should drive anymore,” he lifted the empty bottles of liquor. “These ones kinda pushed me past the okay range.”

“Shit.”

“Guess we’re walking from here,” Sugawara slicked his fingers through his hair and Daichi watched the motion, mouth dry.

The three friends got dressed and the group made its way across the park to the sidewalk once more. At the corner they faced one another.

“So we should take the road along the track to get there, right?” Tooru said.

“No,” Sugawara frowned. “That’s the long way. It’s the street past the zoo. It leads right to it.”

“I don’t think so,” Keiji crossed his arms over his chest. His voice took on a nasally tone with the goggles covering his nose. “I think it’s the one that curves around the library.”

“That one takes at least ten minutes longer than mine.”

“Those are both wrong and don’t even lead to the right place.”

“Yours always has construction on it so it’s no use even attempting it—”

“Well that one—”

“No, mine—”

Daichi cleared his throat and everyone looked at him.

“Why don’t we just split up?” he cocked an eyebrow. “It’s supposed to be a competition anyway, right?”

They were silent for a long second before Sugawara pursed his lips and nodded.

“Let’s split up. Whoever gets there first gets treated to dinner some other night.”

“You’re on,” Tooru turned and instantly headed down the sidewalk. “C’mon Iwa-chan!”

Iwaizumi sent the others a peace sign and followed after his partner.

“I guess this is goodbye then,” Keiji said to Sugawara. “It was nice knowing you.”

“Fuck off with that farewell shit,” Sugawara flipped him off. “See you in ten minutes, Shakespeare.”

They split off and headed back in the direction of downtown.

When they were alone, Sugawara bumped his shoulder against Daichi’s and he looked at him. Sugawara smirked, corners of his eyes crinkling.

“If you wanted to get me alone, you coulda just said so, Daichi.”

Daichi’s cheeks warmed and he looked away, “If that was actually my intention, then I _would_ have.”

Sugawara giggled and bumped him again.

Daichi cleared his throat and shoved his hands into his pockets.

“You and your friends…” he began. “Seem like you have a lot of fun.”

Sugawara hummed. “Never a dull moment.”

“How long have you all known each other?”

“Well,” he scratched under his collar and the bell jingled. “Kuroo and Kenma have been friends since they could walk. Kenma met Keiji in junior high. Me and Tooru met Kuroo in high school. And then the two groups just kinda… merged. Been together ever since!” He smiled at him. “What about you Daichi? How long have you known your friends? The ones who are in love with each other?”

Daichi looked forward. “Since junior high. Lost touch with Ikejiri for a year or two in high school, but then reunited after graduation.”

“And you guys never go on wild adventures together like this one?”

Daichi smiled, “Nah, can’t say we do.”

“I get it. The others can’t keep up with you, right?”

He laughed, “They can… I’m not all that wild or anything.”

“Oh no?”

“I’m more the… reliable and safe one.”

“Hmm… Reliable, sure. Safe?” he chuckled. “Not so sure.”

Daichi glanced at him, eyebrow cocked. “What makes you say that?”

“For one thing, you agreed to hang out with _me_ tonight,” Sugawara grinned wolfishly at him and it sent a thrill down Daichi’s spine. “But on top of that, you also willingly faced that snake with me. And your pedicab driving skills were excitingly reckless.”

“Says the guy who stole the pedicab in the first place, and dove blindly into a city pond,” Daichi teased.

“The difference between me and you, Daichi, is that _I’m_ not pretending to be anything less than the wildly irresponsible demon that we both are.” Sugawara’s eyelids dipped low over his eyes and Daichi gulped.

“Wi-wildly irresponsible,” Daichi scoffed and scratched the back of his head. “Me? Nah.”

“Hmhm,” Sugawara nodded. “Wild and irresponsible Daichi, following strange men down dark alleys…” he wrapped his hands around his arm and tugged him to the right and into a shadowy alleyway between two buildings.

Daichi’s heart leapt and raced as Sugawara faded into the darkness ahead of him, still pulling on his arm as he sang in a haunting voice,

“Oh all the things that might happen to him…”

Daichi stared intently at the silhouette of his head, the cat ears giving him the sudden impression that he had stepped out of his reality and into another, being led by the hand by a mischievous magical creature to somewhere he couldn’t be heard as it devoured his heart.

Daichi tried to ignore the realization that he might actually willingly offer his heart up for consumption if Sugawara truly hungered for it.

“Safe men don’t trust people like me so easily, Daichi,” Sugawara murmured.

Daichi swallowed.

“May-maybe not.”

Sugawara backed himself up against the wall of the alley and pulled Daichi to him. A shaft of light from the street illuminated half of Sugawara’s face as he stared up at him under thick lashes.

Daichi pressed one hand against the brick wall over Sugawara’s shoulder and leaned close.

“Or maybe… you’re not as scary as you think you are.”

Sugawara’s eyebrow ticked up.

“Impossible.”

Daichi wet his lips.

And maybe he _was_ having a gay crisis.

Because the urge to kiss Sugawara was so tangible that he could already taste his lips.

It was such a strange sensation. Daichi was, by almost every standard, a safe and reliable guy who did what was expected of him. He wasn’t the type that went out on sudden adventures with strangers. He wasn’t the type that helped steal pedicabs and broke numerous traffic laws just to win a game. He wasn’t the type that fearlessly wrapped a Burmese python around his shoulders. He wasn’t the type that lusted after men he knew nothing about.

And it was such a strange sensation, the want and need in his gut to close the space between them and steal a taste of this wildly irresponsible demon who had somehow managed to completely capture his heart in a single night.

And it was all because Sugawara had chosen to collect him for Kenma’s scavenger hunt.

Daichi hesitated.

“Sugawara…”

“Just Suga,” he interrupted him, reaching out and wrapping his fingers up in the front of his shirt.

“Suga…” Daichi’s brows furrowed. “What were we?”

“Hm?”

“Me, Iwaizumi, Bokuto.”

Sugawara stared silently up at him.

“What was written on the piece of paper that led you to me?”

For a long moment, he didn’t receive an answer. Sugawara’s eyes dipped down his face and he hummed.

“I’ll tell you,” he said. “If you help me win.”

Daichi gulped.

_If we win._

He slowly removed his hand from the wall and took a step back.

“Then I guess we better hurry up and meet the others.”

Sugawara paused, then nodded.

“Guess so.”

“Let’s go then,” Daichi turned and headed down the alley. “We owe Kenma-kun our best.”

* * *

 

“I still have no idea what we’re supposed to do,” Keiji admitted to Sugawara when they met up at the bar.

“Me neither,” Sugawara sighed. “Our best… our best what?”

Daichi opened the door and they went inside.

“Maybe he wants you to give him your best hug!” Bokuto offered. “That’s what I would want!”

Sugawara waved a hand, “Kenma doesn’t like being touched unless you’re Kuroo.”

Daichi glanced around the bar and spotted Kenma on the opposite side, sitting in his chair and showing his cell phone to a man next to him with awful bedhead and narrow, sleepy eyes.

They walked in his direction.

“Where’s Tooru?” Sugawara asked Keiji.

“Haven’t seen him.”

“Maybe he and Iwaizumi stopped by a love hotel.”

“Lucky.”

“I know, right?”

Daichi coughed into his fist.

They walked up to Kenma and the other man and Sugawara crossed his arms over his chest.

“Alright, tell us, Kenma. What the fuck does _Your Best_ mean?”

“Sorry, no hints,” he replied dully, crossing one leg over the other.

Keiji sighed, “But we don’t get it.”

“Keep trying.”

Sugawara growled and stomped a foot. “Kuroo! Give us a hint!”

The man with the bedhead smirked and leaned back in his chair.

“Sorry,” he drawled. “It’s Kenma’s bachelor party, so he makes the rules.”

_So that’s the fiancé._

Daichi eyed Kuroo silently.

He wasn’t exactly what he was expecting. He looked too… suave. Too sexy. It didn’t match the image in Daichi’s head when he thought about the stories of the hopeless pining and accidental proposal.

Kuroo scratched his head and glanced around the busy bar.

“So…” he started. “Think I got time to take a shit before stuff goes down?”

_Ah._

_Never mind._

“We’re here!”

Everyone turned and watched Tooru and Iwaizumi approach. Tooru’s appearance was disheveled, the lacy underwear half hanging off of his head, the eyepatch askew. His cheeks were flushed, his lips red.

Iwaizumi, in turn, looked relaxed and smug, hands in his pockets as he walked leisurely in their direction.

Daichi didn’t need to ask why they were late.

“Alright, what the fuck are we supposed to do?” Tooru huffed. “I couldn’t think of anything—”

Sugawara reached up and flicked the side of Tooru’s throat.

“Nice hickey, Shithead.”

“ _Fuck off_.”

“’kawa-chan, what took you so long?” Kuroo sang, a shit eating smirk curling the corners of his lips.

“I was held up,” Tooru adjusted the panties on his head.

“Yeah, against a wall,” Keiji muttered.

“Lucky,” Sugawara added.

“ _Anyway_ ,” Tooru snapped. “What are we supposed to be doing right now?”

“Your best,” Kenma said, examining his fingernails.

“Ugh, what does that _mean_?”

Sugawara’s eyes wandered off across the bar and Daichi watched him. He looked back to Kenma, then followed the direction his chair was pointed.

Sugawara’s face went slack and his arms dropped to his sides.

“Of course,” he said with a sigh. He looked at Daichi and then gestured to the opposite side of the bar.

Atop a long table perched on a low stage were three watermelons.

“… watermelons?” Daichi blinked.

Sugawara rubbed his eyes and faced Kenma.

“I knew I never should have shown you those videos.”

Kenma grinned wide.

Tooru and Keiji spotted the watermelons and groaned.

“Watermelon eating contest!” Tooru wailed. “Whyyyy?”

“Ohh I love watermelon!” Bokuto exclaimed.

“Good, you’re going to be eating a lot of it,” Kuroo chuckled.

“I get to eat it too?” Bokuto’s eyes widened. “Awesome!”

Kenma stood and moved past the group.

“C’mon then,” he called. “Let’s start.”

Everyone followed him up to the stage and Kenma flagged down the bartender.

“Hey, are these our lucky contestants?” he said as he walked up, clapping his hands.

“This is them,” Kenma sat again and Kuroo sat beside him.

“Great!” the bartender clapped Bokuto on the shoulder. “How about we get right into it? You guys get on up there and pick your melons!”

Daichi and the others climbed the stage. Tooru and Iwaizumi took the melon on the far right, Sugawara and Daichi the middle, and Keiji and Bokuto the left.

The bartender hopped onto the stage and grabbed a microphone from its stand.

He immediately drew the attention of everyone in the bar and hyped them up for the challenge ahead. People surrounded the stage and cheered.

Daichi glanced at Sugawara, but the man was rolling their watermelon back and forth, eyeing it intensely.

“Is everyone excited?” the bartender asked and the bar erupted. “That’s what I like to hear!” he pumped a fist in the air and turned to the table. “Each team has a melon. When I say go, you’re in charge of breaking it open and eating as much as you can in five minutes! The team with the least amount of melon remaining at the end of the time is our winner!”

The crowd cheered again.

Kenma grinned and lifted his phone.

“Are you ready?”

“READY,” Sugawara, Keiji, and Tooru all barked in unison, tensed over their watermelons like predators about to pounce.

The bartender lifted his arm, hesitated, and then brought it down, shouting, “GO!”

“ _Hiyah!_ ” Sugawara lifted his fist and drove it down into the melon, splitting it in two with a single punch.

The action caught Daichi completely off guard and he let out a sputtering laugh, taking a step backwards in shock.

“Ah… Ah… _Hahahahaha!_ ” Daichi bent over, clutching his stomach.

“Daichi, quit laughing and eat!” Sugawara grabbed one half of the watermelon and dug his hands into it, ripping large chunks from it and instantly shoving them into his mouth.

Tears streamed down Daichi’s cheeks and he wheezed.

“Suga,” he squeaked. “You just… punched… a watermelon…”

Sugawara growled and shoved another fistful of fruit into his mouth, juice and pulp dripping down his chin.

“Yeah yeah,” he mumbled around his chewing, voice muffled. “Don’t let that be the thing that gets your dick hard. Eat!”

Daichi stumbled back up to the table, still crying and sputtering with laughter as he grabbed his half of the melon and dug into it. He glanced at the other teams, who were already a step behind Sugawara, having taken longer to open their fruit. Daichi attempted to cease his laughter and bit into a chunk of the melon.

He made the mistake of allowing his eyes to slide in Sugawara’s direction.

The man was already half done with his portion, hands and face covered in the pink pulp, his cheeks inflated like a chipmunk.

The ridiculous, almost _savage_ way he consumed the fruit, paired with the collar and ears…

It was just too much for Daichi to handle.

“ _Hahahahaha!_ ”

He leaned heavily on the table, new tears forming.

Sugawara’s gaze flickered towards him and his eyes crinkled. He sputtered, losing some of the melon from his mouth as giggles bubbled up to the surface.

“Shtahp,” he begged, pressing a sticky hand over his lips to keep his bites inside.

Daichi stuffed watermelon into his mouth, but continued to laugh, his stomach and sides beginning to ache.

And he couldn’t take his eyes off of his partner. Even though every look made him lose a little more of his control. He just couldn’t help but watch as Sugawara dug deeper into his half of the fruit and shoved fistful after fistful into his mouth, uncaring when it splattered over his chin or cheeks or dripped onto his shirt.

He was just so…

_Cute._

_Fun._

Daichi couldn’t take his eyes off of Sugawara or stop the laughter from shaking him to the core and he was having the time of his life.

He couldn’t remember the last time he had so much fun.

Eventually, Sugawara finished his portion and ripped off part of the rind. He hurled it past Daichi, hitting Tooru in the back of the head and earning a screech of outrage.

And Daichi fell to his knees.

“ _Ahahaha!_ ”

Sugawara slid over to him and started tearing at his half of the melon.

“C’mon,” he said, mouth still partially full, holding back the giggles trying to break free. “Daichi you useless slut.”

Daichi tried to speak, to convey just what it was that he found so hilarious about the situation, but it came out as nothing more than a stream of blabbering, high pitched, gibberish.

Sugawara spat watermelon onto the table and shrieked out a laugh.

He fell to his knees next to Daichi and leaned heavily against him, head falling back as he cackled.

“Stop!” he whined. “ _We gotta_ — _hahaha_ — _keep eating_!”

He grabbed a handful of watermelon and shoved it into Daichi’s mouth before doing the same to himself.

They made it through the handful and fell back to laughter once more, heads accidentally cracking together when they both leaned forward at the same time, which only made them laugh harder.

“Daichiiiii,” Sugawara groaned. “We’re gonna lose…”

“No we’re not,” Daichi thrust to his feet, dragging Sugawara with him.

They each grabbed two handfuls of melon.

“Our second wind!” Daichi said. “Go!”

They both stuffed the fruit into their mouths, took two bites, and then the bartender was calling out,

“And time’s up! No more eating!”

Sugawara opened his mouth and the half chewed chunks plopped back onto the table.

Daichi nearly choked on his, turning away. He swallowed, tears gathering in the corners of his eyes, and whirled back to Sugawara.

“ _Why did you just spit it back out?_ ” he laughed.

Sugawara let out a pitiful squeaking laugh and backed away from the table.

“I panicked!” he said. “Ugh, I’m going to throw up.”

“Alright, great job to all our teams! Let’s see who our winner is!” The bartender approached the table and peered down at the melons, starting with Keiji’s and Bokuto’s. “Okay! You two made a good dent on here, let’s show everyone…” he lifted the two halves of melon and the bar cheered. He set them back down and skipped over Sugawara and Daichi to Tooru and Iwaizumi.

Sugawara turned to Daichi.

“He doesn’t want anything to do with us,” he whispered.

Daichi covered his face with both hands momentarily, struggling to gain control before he fell back into a fit of mania.

“Ohh, another good fight over here!”

Daichi lowered his hands and glanced over to where the bartender lifted Iwaizumi’s and Tooru’s melon up and showed off their handiwork.

He replaced it on the table.

“Now, let’s look and see how our clowns did, yeah?”

“ _Pffft_ ,” Sugawara pressed his wrist to his eyes.

“Wow, now look at this _massacre_ ,” the bartender hefted the two halves and the bar roared. “Did someone let a hyena loose on this baby? I think we found our winners…”

Sugawara squealed and leapt into Daichi’s chest, throwing his arms around his neck. Daichi spun him in a circle, laughing.

And he was having the god damn time of his life.

* * *

 

“Don’t be sad, Tooru,” Kenma mumbled, nuzzling the back of Kuroo’s neck sleepily. “At least you have a few days to prepare yourself for your punishment…”

“ _I’d rather be dead!_ ” Tooru wailed and sobbed into his hands.

“Too bad,” Kenma yawned.

Kuroo chuckled and bounced him higher up on his back. “I’m gonna get him home before he passes out.”

Keiji walked up and patted the smaller man’s back.

“Rest up,” he said. “I’m glad you had fun tonight.”

Kenma gave a drowsy smile.

“And I’m glad I won!” Sugawara announced, cupping his mouth with both hands.

“Shut up, Suga-chan!” Tooru attempted to attack the other man, but Iwaizumi caught him around the waist. “You cheated! You had to have cheated! Fight me!”

Sugawara stuck his tongue out at him.

Kuroo laughed. “Alright. See you guys later. Thanks for taking care of him tonight.”

They waved and watched as he carried his sleepy fiancé down the quiet, empty street.

When they disappeared out of view, Sugawara turned to the others and grinned.

“I can’t wait for Kuroo’s bachelor party!”

“Ooooh!” Bokuto perked. “You guys get to do Kuroo’s too?”

“Well yeah, we’re his only friends,” Keiji said with a yawn.

“ _Ugh_ ,” Tooru pulled the lacy underwear from his hair and tossed it at him. “Why couldn’t they have just eloped like _normal_ people?”

Sugawara leaned towards Daichi and said, “Sounds like someone is a poor _loser_.”

Tooru lunged for him again, but Iwaizumi caught him and hauled him against his side.

“Let it go,” he said and pulled the fake glasses off of his nose.

“But Iwa-chan—”

“Let it go and come home with me,” Iwaizumi turned, dragging him along.

Tooru threw triumphant smile over his shoulder, wiggling his eyebrows.

Sugawara clicked his tongue, “Since he’s the loser, he shouldn’t get any sort of reward…”

Keiji yawned again and rubbed his eyes, “Well… I guess I’ll turn in for the night too…”

“Let me walk you home!” Bokuto practically shouted the eager offer.

Keiji smiled, “I’d like that.”

They said their farewells and took their leave.

And then Daichi and Sugawara were alone.

Daichi gulped and tugged on the collar of his shirt.

Now what?

Should he… should he also invite Sugawara home with him?

_No, no, no, no…_

Daichi wasn’t nearly bold enough to do something like that.

Sugawara suddenly turned towards him and Daichi’s spine straightened.

“So,” he said, smiling. “We won.”

“Ah…” Daichi cleared his throat. “Yeah. We did.”

Sugawara stared at him silently for long seconds. Daichi’s stomach twisted. He could barely concentrate with the _thumpthumpthumpthumpthump_ of his heart raging in his ears.

“Uhm…” his voice was rough when he finally spoke again. “You… you said that you’d tell me, if we won. I mean… what we were. Uh… Bokuto, Iwaizumi, and me.”

“Hmm… I did say that… didn’t I?” Sugawara cocked an eyebrow.

“Yeah.”

Sugawara moved closer and Daichi did the same.

“I said something else, didn’t I?”

“Di-did you?”

“Hmhm. I believe I said something about giving you a reward?”

“Oh… yeah. I think you did say that too…” Daichi couldn’t tear his eyes from Sugawara’s lips.

It had to be pretty clear what it was he was hoping his reward would be.

“I guess I should probably keep my promise, shouldn’t I?” Sugawara’s voice lowered.

Daichi gulped again.

“Yeah… I guess you should…”

Sugawara’s lips curled.

He leaned up and Daichi met him halfway, reaching forward to cup his face in his hands. They kissed, soft, slow, without a single gram of the urgency that Daichi felt winding itself in the pit of his belly.

_Oh._

_Oh._

Daichi was _definitely_ having a gay crisis.

Sugawara was in no rush to end the kiss, so Daichi prolonged it for as long as he could, savoring the sensation of Sugawara’s still slightly sticky lips pressed tenderly to his. He didn’t want the connection to ever end, even if it wasn’t the type of kiss that the throbbing in his groin wished for.

Daichi felt a touch at his right front pocket, and then Sugawara was drawing away. He wanted to drag him back, make it impossible for him to leave, but he didn’t. Instead, he dropped his hands from Sugawara’s face and opened his eyes.

Sugawara smiled, and it warmed Daichi to his core.

“I’ll see you around, Daichi,” he said, voice soft. He took one, and then a second languid step backwards before turning on his heel and walking away.

Daichi wanted to call after him. Stop him. Invite him home.

But he didn’t.

Instead, he watched him he go until he disappeared around the corner down the block.

Daichi let out a shuddering breath and rubbed his eyes.

He spent a few seconds collecting himself, and then checked his pocket.

Inside was a folded strip of paper.

Daichi’s mouth went dry and he lifted it. On the outside, Sugawara’s name was printed, followed by a phone number. Daichi smiled and unfolded it.

Scrawled in Kenma’s messy hand on the inside of the paper were the words,

_Future Boyfriend_

Daichi let out a laugh and pressed a hand over his eyes, reveling in the giddy excitement that filled him.

He didn’t know how long he stood there, struggling to contain the giggles that threatened to consume him once more. But eventually, he found the energy to travel down the street and hail a taxi, finally calling an end to what was hands down the best night of his young life.

(So far)

It wasn't until he was halfway home that he remembered that they never returned the pedicab.

_Oh._

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in a rush over the course of these past few days.  
> I'm glad I was able to finish it on time, even if I not so secretly wish I had given myself more time so that I could have done it a little better. Hnnnnnnnn.  
> It ended up much longer than I anticipated, but ehhhhh who's complaining?  
> Dedicated to the lovely SugarSaharok!!! Please go send her many birthday wishes and love at her art blog, [Here!](http://silly-drawings-by-sugar.tumblr.com/)  
> Love you Sugar!!! Thank you for all that you do for the Haikyuu and DaiSuga community~~~~
> 
> (Come yell at me on [Tumblr.](http://mooifyourecows.tumblr.com/))


End file.
